I listened to people comment on how if it wasn’t for their mother or grandmother they wouldn’t be in the same room with a certain person or persons. It got me thinking about my youth and how we spent part or all of a holiday with my Grandmother Elizabeth. I remember my parents and others saying how the only time they had to “put up with so and so” was at Grandma’s house. Sadly, when she passed I saw how she had been the “glue” that kept the family together especially during holidays.
As the years have passed I have noticed that not just in families but in work places there is often the one person who is the “glue.” This is the person who remembers co-workers birthdays and organizes a Christmas get together. She, and I use the pronoun she because this job is filled by a woman 99.9% of the time, organizes a “Meal Train” if some has had a medical emergency or death in the family. She makes sure everyone knows where the funeral or memorial service will be or where food can be dropped off.
These people don’t complain because there is a real blessing in being the “glue.” If someone asks them why they do it they look confused because in their mind, why wouldn’t you do these things? They are a reminder of times past when being the “glue” wasn’t so rare. It was a time when neighborhoods were their own little communities and people knew if someone was sick, was suffering from the death of a loved one or some other negative event was impacting their life. Sadly, today, many people have lived on their street for years and don’t know their neighbor’s names let along what might be going on in their lives.
If you look at your family and your work place and don’t recognize anyone as being the “glue” then think about stepping up to the plate. Invite your family over for dinner on a regular weekend. When they seem shocked as it isn’t a holiday explain that family should be the core of our lives. Tell them how we have all been too busy and we need to prioritize what is important. How staying connected should be a priority. When they tell you how it is bad enough they have to tolerate so and so on the holidays explain that all families have issues but in the end family is what makes us who we are today.
In the work place start small. Ask if everyone minds making a list of everyone’s birthdays. Then see who might want to help making sure that there is a cake in the lunch room on those days. You will be surprised how many will want to be apart of this endeavor. I know this is not possible in all places of employment but if it is it can make a big difference in the spirit of those you work with day to day. When I was working I used to enter the break room by saying, “Hello, Work Family!” Some weeks we can easily spend more of our awake hours with our “work family” than with our real family.
In your neighborhood try organizing a “get to know your neighbor” type of event. When people ask why tell them how you would like to get to know your neighbors better. Explain how you want an event with food, music and games. It won’t be long before people will be offering to organize certain aspects of the get together. Before you know it people will be exchanging phone numbers and organizing play dates for their children. Men will be discussing who has what tool etc.
We need the “glue” in our lives because without it we are just a bunch of people wandering through the days haphazardly bumping into each other. God made us social creatures and we are healthier physically and mentally if we engage the social aspects of our lives.
So, get out there and be the “glue”!!
You could not be more RIGHT!!!
One issue I see is that to be “the glue” you need to be much stickier now, because people are so polarized that they repel each other.
I want to do better just for having read this.